my body had no chance at making a baby :(

So the dreaded temperature drop and aunt flo started this morning. I started cramping last night so I had a feeling it was going to happen. Once again I have a luteal phase of 9 days. No way was there ever going to be a chance of making a baby this month as my body just isn’t ready for it.

It makes me angry that almost 6 months since we started to try and I have nothing to show for it besides a miscarriage. I know it will happen eventually and I know after having a miscarriage your body takes awhile to get back to normal but it just makes me sad and angry. I just keep hoping that none of this is anything to do with getting Toxic Shock and that nothing is to do with my body just not recovering perfect from that. For today i’ll be annoying at my body but then i’ll get over it and move on to the next month.

ahh besides long cycles the first time it happened fast. even the last one that I miscarried happened fast.. both on the second cycle all I can hope for is that it happens again for me the second cycle back from the miscarriage. If it doesn’t happen next cycle I might need to take a break for a month .. i’m not sure I can be pregnant and due in December given the bad things that have happened the past two Decembers.

In the mean time i’ll be jealous of every one I hear that’s pregnant and i’ll just keep on trying!

 

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