I need some happiness stat!

All I feel like I do is whinge…poor me etc I just feel like the past 18 months has been constant hurdles..I need some happiness to break it up!

Today I should of been 37+1 the same gestation that I had my son…I should be meeting my next bub but I’m not.

I remember thinking back when I had toxic shock and thinking after okay let’s have another baby, let’s to some degree get this baby making phase of our lives over. I love my son, I didn’t hate pregnancy, I just hate everything that has happened with my body after. I thought I had my happiness, nope miscarriage… Thought I might of had it again.. Nope another miscarriage. We have started trying again but first month has been a fail. I just want my body to show me it can do something positive.

My son is now 2 and he’s being soo gently with toys, rocking his teddy, giving it kisses.. He would of been perfect with a little brother it sister now. I feel to some degree he’s missing out.

Hopefully soon it all happens for us!

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